New York 46-48 (Oct 5-7) "I am... the son who runs the farthest"

I got some more care package goodness today I however have not been able to see whats inside because I am either to busy or tired to go to Jessica's to get it but tomorrow I have to so I'm excited for that.

I haven't had much going on but the Nightmare House so I have had time for some self reflection which isn't always a good thing. I made some interesting realizations, one of them being that tag line of this blog is no joke, I am one lost son.

When I left I thought I had a fairly good grasp on who I was, what I wanted, and while my career goals haven't change I am becoming more and more confused as to who the man in the mirror in front of me actually is. It isn't a bad thing necessarily, change is good. Where I am getting myself into trouble however is the areas of myself that I can see changing but I don't know which way they are going to go.

It is a trying and confusing time for many more reasons that one and the past couple days have been dark days of the spirit.

I got my check today and it was missing a lot of hours on it...so I have to wait till the next check for that to be fixed. Which means I have enough money to pay rent and 8 dollars left over till next week. I might be able to work this weekend for pandora which will buy my metro card and more food.

Either way I am not worried. A change I am enjoying is New York is beating the fear out of me. I discovered that not only can I make 8 dollars last a week but I can also survive that long without the 8 bucks. It is hard and it isn't something I WANT to do but goddamn it if it isn't something I can do now.

when the next check does come or if someone ends up giving me some cash for my birthday I'm spending 68 of it on getting on Actors Access.com NYcastins is doing shit for me and I hear nothing but good things about Actors Access. I need to find a new project that starts in November so I can keep calling myself a working actor.

Also the highlight of my week, tonight a guy (whos name escapes me) from Gossip Girls came in the Nightmare House and I scared the crap out of him. I also heard that vincent denafreo is a regular yearly customer at the Nightmare house...as well as Neal Patrick Harris....I just may shit myself.

Finally a word to the wise...don't spit on a person in a haunted house or you just might "Accidentally" get tons of fake blood in your hair...and you also might get a gross fake rabbit stuffed in your whore face...just saying.

I love you all

KH-