Wow it's been a while. I apologize for the laps in posts but when you hear about my week you will understand.
We started the haunted house a few days ago. The first day was a dry run through with Time Out magazine (I think) and the people who won tickets through them. I screamed, I yelled, I grossed people out.
The second day was an actual open house and on that day NBC came through the house camera crew and all. So this Halloween I may be half naked and screaming on national television which would be awesome.
My voice is toast though, I can barely talk right now which means its probably a good thing we are off for a few days. I took on a third job this weekend just so I could pay the rent with guaranteed money not this commission BS.
The job is promoting Pandora Jewelry. Don't get excited mom I don't get any discounts, I wear a flag on my back (its attached to a back pack) and pass out flyers for seventy a day.
So this is how my days have looked. I wake up at 8, go to work and stand all day, get off at 5, rush the the House where I don't get off till 11 or 12, finally sit down when I get home at around 1, go to sleep, wake up at 8 repeat.
I forgot what being well rested felt like till this morning. its all worth it because this is what I came here to do. I got my first acting gig and two steady strait jobs in the first month I was out here. I have my own room in a renowned entertainment attraction, AND I'm getting paid for it, and I live in the greatest city in the country...I'll sacrifice some comfort for that pay off.
I'm tired but Im happy.
I also got a care package of food from my woman this week so I am well fed. Some how she found a way to take care of me from thousands of miles away. I think she may have been born with a stamp on her forehead that says "KEEPER"
I love you all
KH-
Monday, September 27, 2010
Tuesday, September 21, 2010
New York Day 31-33 "Fast As You Can"
Work and than work, work and than work. I have made six sales in seven days of working this job...I feel like I'm getting better though. However I'm not making the big money yet so I don't have enough cash to play. I've had just enough to eat but that is in large part due to dear dear friends of mine who have found it in there heart not to let a fat man miss a meal.
It is really starting ware on me. I need some fun, some drunken debauchery, some chance encounters with new people, some laughs in a setting other than work. I need to go out. I have a dinner party on sunday with a friend from out here so that may just perk me up and if it doesn't than hey...free food.
I had my orientation for the haunted house yesterday and found out that along with paying us a living wage for full time work they are also feeding us an hour before show time which is really exciting.
I got to see my room today. I am not going to be "boo" scary but I will be incredibly disgusting and disturbing. That is all I am saying until it's all said and done so you either have to come visit me for this show or you are going to have to wait till November.
It blows my mind every time I skip a few blogs and realize it's only been three days. A day in this town feels like a week. I guess that is just because of how busy I am here. I like it though, the productivity, the motivation, it's a positive influence I just need a release. I'm getting complacent and irritable and that needs to change soon.
Because I work in Times Square I can actually see the drop in tourism now that fall is here. It was pretty impressive. The city to me is taking on an entirely different atmosphere. People are starting to settle in and get ready for a winter that is alien to me. It is palatable though, the attitude shift. It isn't a bad thing, it's actually kind of nice, it makes me feel more like a New Yorker I guess.
I suppose if this where a novel now would be the time to say "I'm broke, and tired in an alien city...and it's getting cold." and than leave you with an ominous blank page but that's not the case. The winter is making me nervous but I can't live months from now. I live moment to moment here and that is what will get me through anything that comes at me.
I love you all
KH-
It is really starting ware on me. I need some fun, some drunken debauchery, some chance encounters with new people, some laughs in a setting other than work. I need to go out. I have a dinner party on sunday with a friend from out here so that may just perk me up and if it doesn't than hey...free food.
I had my orientation for the haunted house yesterday and found out that along with paying us a living wage for full time work they are also feeding us an hour before show time which is really exciting.
I got to see my room today. I am not going to be "boo" scary but I will be incredibly disgusting and disturbing. That is all I am saying until it's all said and done so you either have to come visit me for this show or you are going to have to wait till November.
It blows my mind every time I skip a few blogs and realize it's only been three days. A day in this town feels like a week. I guess that is just because of how busy I am here. I like it though, the productivity, the motivation, it's a positive influence I just need a release. I'm getting complacent and irritable and that needs to change soon.
Because I work in Times Square I can actually see the drop in tourism now that fall is here. It was pretty impressive. The city to me is taking on an entirely different atmosphere. People are starting to settle in and get ready for a winter that is alien to me. It is palatable though, the attitude shift. It isn't a bad thing, it's actually kind of nice, it makes me feel more like a New Yorker I guess.
I suppose if this where a novel now would be the time to say "I'm broke, and tired in an alien city...and it's getting cold." and than leave you with an ominous blank page but that's not the case. The winter is making me nervous but I can't live months from now. I live moment to moment here and that is what will get me through anything that comes at me.
I love you all
KH-
Saturday, September 18, 2010
New York Day 30 "Would You Like To Go To A Comedy Show?"
I went to bed last night totally and completely exhausted. I got up, got my "Brooklyn Bagel & Coffee Company" bagel, went to work and sucked at it for a few hours. At some point during the day the owner of my marketing company "Big Apple Marketing" decided to take me under his wing.
This included walking with him through Time Square to the ATT store so everyone would know I was with him. Than it involved going to the Lower west side to sell tickets for another five hours at a better location. I made my first and second sale but it took me ten hours.
If i didn't have this nightmare job i would have given up on this one but i see the potential to make real money here and i can pay the rent with the nightmare house while I'm learning this.
Ten hours of saying weird things to people to get them to stop and talk to me about buying comedy tickets and I am still really enjoying this job. I would have liked to grab a drink or something on the one month anniversary of my coming to New York but I'll settle for an extra thirty bucks in my pocket and a bagel this morning.
Love you all
KH-
This included walking with him through Time Square to the ATT store so everyone would know I was with him. Than it involved going to the Lower west side to sell tickets for another five hours at a better location. I made my first and second sale but it took me ten hours.
If i didn't have this nightmare job i would have given up on this one but i see the potential to make real money here and i can pay the rent with the nightmare house while I'm learning this.
Ten hours of saying weird things to people to get them to stop and talk to me about buying comedy tickets and I am still really enjoying this job. I would have liked to grab a drink or something on the one month anniversary of my coming to New York but I'll settle for an extra thirty bucks in my pocket and a bagel this morning.
Love you all
KH-
Thursday, September 16, 2010
New York Day 27-29 "If You Can Make It Here..."
Bleary eyed and somber I type this blog tonight with hopes for the future and mixed feelings for the present. The last couple days has been an interesting experience. My new job selling tickets for Big Apple Marketing has been the most fun job I've ever had...It's just a shame I am making zero dollars. I have confidence however that I will do well eventually. The only difference between what I'm doing and what the guys who have been making money hand over fist for eight years are doing is a mixture of utilizing knowledge and experience accrued over the years and a degree of confidence I haven't mastered just yet...but I will.
But I think it is good that I am having fun while I am not making any money. Today I decided to wear my kilt and turns out, New Yorkers aren't impressed, a lot of people liked it but not a lot of people where caught off guard by it. Also, the vast majority of tourists I deal with are from over seas and they really are also not fazed by a grown man wearing a kilt. I got a call half way through my shift today "Hello is this Kyle?" I know who it is before they even finish "sure is." "Hey this is John from 'Nightmare' we wanted to know if you wanted to stand in a room and chop up bunnies for us 7 nights a week." "Hells yes!"
So starting Monday I have a job working in THE haunted house in America. It gets tons of write ups from local news papers and magazines...and by local I mean the New York Times. The mayor as well as some other VIP's and press are coming for a private showing of the house on Thursday. Not only that but this means three things that are very important to me. Number one, I have no worries about staying in New York or keeping a roof over my head for at least the next two months because this is indeed a paying gig. Number two, I can officially call myself a working actor, with two paying gigs under my belt I think that qualifies me for the title. Number three I just booked my very first New York audition...so far my track record is looking pretty great.
This also means however that I will not be able to visit Illinois in October for my birthday. You all probably don't realize this but my time here is fairly lonely. The three close friends I have here have lives they need to tend to obviously and I spend a vast majority of my time alone. Granted my new job has fixed that but all that means is I made some work friends which is all fine and good but I also spend the times I am not alone being rejected by what feels like the entirety of Times Square. I was really looking forward to coming home and seeing my friends, I was really looking forward to seeing Lauren, I was really looking forward to seeing my family, I was really looking forward to seeing my mom and dad's dogs...I was looking forward to drinking in Kryptonite again.
I am going to get very excited about this house very soon but right now I have to have mixed feelings about it because I am pretty lonely. That is all about to change though, I am about to meet a group of interesting crazy people who work in a haunted house and hopefully I can start making some friends that are my friends not the people who know me solely as Jessica or Lindsay's friend.
Tomorrow marks my 30th day in New York. I have officially made it a full month in this city and haven't died, gotten beat up, gotten into a fight at all, gotten addicted to any substance other than the one that is fairly socially acceptable (I should clarify...I mean tobacco because out here 'socially acceptable substance' is relative) and I haven't given up. What I have done is party like a rock star, find a job, find a place, lose a job, live poor as all hell for a bit, play for pennies, go hungry a couple nights, eaten like a trailer trash king, couch surfed, got scared, got lonely, got excited, felt fulfilled, got angry, got sad, got happy, got another job, booked my first NY audition and learned more about myself in a short 4 weeks than I have my entire 23 years of living.
Here is to another 30 days...now tomorrow I might just get smashed with the scott and the irishman I work with because really is there any better way to celebrate? Also I need to turn these work buddies into real life buddies cus Jesus H I am tired of feeling like the new kid in school.
I love you all.
KH-
But I think it is good that I am having fun while I am not making any money. Today I decided to wear my kilt and turns out, New Yorkers aren't impressed, a lot of people liked it but not a lot of people where caught off guard by it. Also, the vast majority of tourists I deal with are from over seas and they really are also not fazed by a grown man wearing a kilt. I got a call half way through my shift today "Hello is this Kyle?" I know who it is before they even finish "sure is." "Hey this is John from 'Nightmare' we wanted to know if you wanted to stand in a room and chop up bunnies for us 7 nights a week." "Hells yes!"
So starting Monday I have a job working in THE haunted house in America. It gets tons of write ups from local news papers and magazines...and by local I mean the New York Times. The mayor as well as some other VIP's and press are coming for a private showing of the house on Thursday. Not only that but this means three things that are very important to me. Number one, I have no worries about staying in New York or keeping a roof over my head for at least the next two months because this is indeed a paying gig. Number two, I can officially call myself a working actor, with two paying gigs under my belt I think that qualifies me for the title. Number three I just booked my very first New York audition...so far my track record is looking pretty great.
This also means however that I will not be able to visit Illinois in October for my birthday. You all probably don't realize this but my time here is fairly lonely. The three close friends I have here have lives they need to tend to obviously and I spend a vast majority of my time alone. Granted my new job has fixed that but all that means is I made some work friends which is all fine and good but I also spend the times I am not alone being rejected by what feels like the entirety of Times Square. I was really looking forward to coming home and seeing my friends, I was really looking forward to seeing Lauren, I was really looking forward to seeing my family, I was really looking forward to seeing my mom and dad's dogs...I was looking forward to drinking in Kryptonite again.
I am going to get very excited about this house very soon but right now I have to have mixed feelings about it because I am pretty lonely. That is all about to change though, I am about to meet a group of interesting crazy people who work in a haunted house and hopefully I can start making some friends that are my friends not the people who know me solely as Jessica or Lindsay's friend.
Tomorrow marks my 30th day in New York. I have officially made it a full month in this city and haven't died, gotten beat up, gotten into a fight at all, gotten addicted to any substance other than the one that is fairly socially acceptable (I should clarify...I mean tobacco because out here 'socially acceptable substance' is relative) and I haven't given up. What I have done is party like a rock star, find a job, find a place, lose a job, live poor as all hell for a bit, play for pennies, go hungry a couple nights, eaten like a trailer trash king, couch surfed, got scared, got lonely, got excited, felt fulfilled, got angry, got sad, got happy, got another job, booked my first NY audition and learned more about myself in a short 4 weeks than I have my entire 23 years of living.
Here is to another 30 days...now tomorrow I might just get smashed with the scott and the irishman I work with because really is there any better way to celebrate? Also I need to turn these work buddies into real life buddies cus Jesus H I am tired of feeling like the new kid in school.
I love you all.
KH-
New York Day 27-29 "If You Can Make It Here..."
Bleary eyed and somber I type this blog tonight with hopes for the future and mixed feelings for the present. The last couple days has been an interesting experience. My new job selling tickets for Big Apple Marketing has been the most fun job I've ever had...It's just a shame I am making zero dollars. I have confidence however that I will do well eventually. The only difference between what I'm doing and what the guys who have been making money hand over fist for eight years are doing is a mixture of utilizing knowledge and experience accrued over the years and a degree of confidence I haven't mastered just yet...but I will.
But I think it is good that I am having fun while I am not making any money. Today I decided to wear my kilt and turns out, New Yorkers aren't impressed, a lot of people liked it but not a lot of people where caught off guard by it. Also, the vast majority of tourists I deal with are from over seas and they really are also not fazed by a grown man wearing a kilt. I got a call half way through my shift today "Hello is this Kyle?" I know who it is before they even finish "sure is." "Hey this is John from 'Nightmare' we wanted to know if you wanted to stand in a room and chop up bunnies for us 7 nights a week." "Hells yes!"
So starting Monday I have a job working in THE haunted house in America. It gets tons of write ups from local news papers and magazines...and by local I mean the New York Times. The mayor as well as some other VIP's and press are coming for a private showing of the house on Thursday. Not only that but this means three things that are very important to me. Number one, I have no worries about staying in New York or keeping a roof over my head for at least the next two months because this is indeed a paying gig. Number two, I can officially call myself a working actor, with two paying gigs under my belt I think that qualifies me for the title. Number three I just booked my very first New York audition...so far my track record is looking pretty great.
This also means however that I will not be able to visit Illinois in October for my birthday. You all probably don't realize this but my time here is fairly lonely. The three close friends I have here have lives they need to tend to obviously and I spend a vast majority of my time alone. Granted my new job has fixed that but all that means is I made some work friends which is all fine and good but I also spend the times I am not alone being rejected by what feels like the entirety of Times Square. I was really looking forward to coming home and seeing my friends, I was really looking forward to seeing Lauren, I was really looking forward to seeing my family, I was really looking forward to seeing my mom and dad's dogs...I was looking forward to drinking in Kryptonite again.
I am going to get very excited about this house very soon but right now I have to have mixed feelings about it because I am pretty lonely. That is all about to change though, I am about to meet a group of interesting crazy people who work in a haunted house and hopefully I can start making some friends that are my friends not the people who know me solely as Jessica or Lindsay's friend.
Tomorrow marks my 30th day in New York. I have officially made it a full month in this city and haven't died, gotten beat up, gotten into a fight at all, gotten addicted to any substance other than the one that is fairly socially acceptable (I should clarify...I mean tobacco because out here 'socially acceptable substance' is relative) and I haven't given up. What I have done is party like a rock star, find a job, find a place, lose a job, live poor as all hell for a bit, play for pennies, go hungry a couple nights, eaten like a trailer trash king, couch surfed, got scared, got lonely, got excited, felt fulfilled, got angry, got sad, got happy, got another job, booked my first NY audition and learned more about myself in a short 4 weeks than I have my entire 23 years of living.
Here is to another 30 days...now tomorrow I might just get smashed with the scott and the irishman I work with because really is there any better way to celebrate? Also I need to turn these work buddies into real life buddies cus Jesus H I am tired of feeling like the new kid in school.
I love you all.
KH-
But I think it is good that I am having fun while I am not making any money. Today I decided to wear my kilt and turns out, New Yorkers aren't impressed, a lot of people liked it but not a lot of people where caught off guard by it. Also, the vast majority of tourists I deal with are from over seas and they really are also not fazed by a grown man wearing a kilt. I got a call half way through my shift today "Hello is this Kyle?" I know who it is before they even finish "sure is." "Hey this is John from 'Nightmare' we wanted to know if you wanted to stand in a room and chop up bunnies for us 7 nights a week." "Hells yes!"
So starting Monday I have a job working in THE haunted house in America. It gets tons of write ups from local news papers and magazines...and by local I mean the New York Times. The mayor as well as some other VIP's and press are coming for a private showing of the house on Thursday. Not only that but this means three things that are very important to me. Number one, I have no worries about staying in New York or keeping a roof over my head for at least the next two months because this is indeed a paying gig. Number two, I can officially call myself a working actor, with two paying gigs under my belt I think that qualifies me for the title. Number three I just booked my very first New York audition...so far my track record is looking pretty great.
This also means however that I will not be able to visit Illinois in October for my birthday. You all probably don't realize this but my time here is fairly lonely. The three close friends I have here have lives they need to tend to obviously and I spend a vast majority of my time alone. Granted my new job has fixed that but all that means is I made some work friends which is all fine and good but I also spend the times I am not alone being rejected by what feels like the entirety of Times Square. I was really looking forward to coming home and seeing my friends, I was really looking forward to seeing Lauren, I was really looking forward to seeing my family, I was really looking forward to seeing my mom and dad's dogs...I was looking forward to drinking in Kryptonite again.
I am going to get very excited about this house very soon but right now I have to have mixed feelings about it because I am pretty lonely. That is all about to change though, I am about to meet a group of interesting crazy people who work in a haunted house and hopefully I can start making some friends that are my friends not the people who know me solely as Jessica or Lindsay's friend.
Tomorrow marks my 30th day in New York. I have officially made it a full month in this city and haven't died, gotten beat up, gotten into a fight at all, gotten addicted to any substance other than the one that is fairly socially acceptable (I should clarify...I mean tobacco because out here 'socially acceptable substance' is relative) and I haven't given up. What I have done is party like a rock star, find a job, find a place, lose a job, live poor as all hell for a bit, play for pennies, go hungry a couple nights, eaten like a trailer trash king, couch surfed, got scared, got lonely, got excited, felt fulfilled, got angry, got sad, got happy, got another job, booked my first NY audition and learned more about myself in a short 4 weeks than I have my entire 23 years of living.
Here is to another 30 days...now tomorrow I might just get smashed with the scott and the irishman I work with because really is there any better way to celebrate? Also I need to turn these work buddies into real life buddies cus Jesus H I am tired of feeling like the new kid in school.
I love you all.
KH-
Monday, September 13, 2010
New York day 24-26 "The Ever Changing Landscape"
It has been a long weekend and a productive Monday. I spent Saturday relaxing and regrouping. I did a little writing a lot of worrying but by and large the theme of the day was "I can't do anything till monday and I need to chill out so that's what I'm gonna do" and in that respect I was successful.
Sunday I checked my bank account because I was avoiding it saturday...I didn't need to be any more upset. Than I saw that I had negative 17 in my account...cue the sound of breaking glass and the rushing fear that my NY adventure was coming to a close before it could even start.
I had exactly 30 dollars in my pocket and some of that had to go to food. I did what anyone would do in my situation I called mommy to freak out. Yeah, I'm a big mamma's boy but what good is having a loving supporting family if you never call on them?
My mother took the action she knew would serve me best. She told me to hold on, she told me she would send me some cash to float me by and told me I should do what I came here to do...if what she can provide is another week here than I should stay another week.
Thank you mom
Because the last thing I want to do is give up. After that call I went to central park to play harmonica for some dollars, hopefully enough to buy a meal. After a few hours I made just over 1.50. I took that gladly and used that plus what I had in my pocket to buy myself a lunch that was more than bread cheese and water.
After wandering around a bit I decided I should just go home. I was tired, I was cold I was wet from the rain and up until twenty minutes before I got on the train I was hungry most the day. I go to use my metro card "Insufficient fare"...Jesus...H...Christ...
I go to pay cash for more metro fare but all I have is a twenty and they have a six dollar change limit so I put in fifteen bucks and call it an investment. I'm discouraged, i'm tired and all i want is to be around someone I love. Well the woman I'm crazy about was vacationing in Florida and all my friends here were otherwise occupied. Fuck this...I'm going to sleep.
I wake up with a deep sense of melancholy and a certainty of failure but damn if I wasn't going to go out swinging. I went to my monday interview with the NY comedy club. The manager informs me it is a commission based ticket selling job. The tickets are twenty a piece for the first week or so I will make 50% commission 75 after that. He also tells me I can start tomorrow morning.
So i guess I have a job. I am excited because with what my mother and my Aunt Sharon are sending me all i have to do is sell 6 tickets tomorrow and I can pay rent. I am then called by a non prof 10$ an hour gig for an interview tomorrow. I will probably stick with the NY comedy job because they are really flexible, like "call in if you have an audition it's cool with us...hell if it's a really nice day out go ahead and call in just remember if your not selling your not making money" flexible. But I am going to reschedule the non prof interview for friday just in case i work this NY comedy job after a few days and realize it isn't going to work out.
After spending the rest of the day in Madison Square Park reading beat poetry and writing (cus I'm totally hipster like that) it was time for my very first NY audition for THE haunted house in America. The house is called "Nightmare" and it is the biggest haunted house in America...its a big deal. It's a "this looks damn good on a resume and gets crazy NY exposure" big. I walk in and the first thing the auditioned says is "awesome."
I feel like I did a good job, I feel like I nailed it. The only down side to this if I get the part is I wont be able to visit home in October. I will be back in Nov and I will figure out a way to see Lauren before than...I will make whatever I have to work because if I book my very first audition and can call myself a working actor after only a month of being here I can not pass up that opportunity.
Afterwards Jessica fed me (which is good because I had barely eaten today) and gave me booze. I'm going to bed with a full stomach, a slight buzz and a good feeling about the next few weeks.
Today was a good day...cross your fingers and send prayers that I can have a few more like this.
KH-
Sunday I checked my bank account because I was avoiding it saturday...I didn't need to be any more upset. Than I saw that I had negative 17 in my account...cue the sound of breaking glass and the rushing fear that my NY adventure was coming to a close before it could even start.
I had exactly 30 dollars in my pocket and some of that had to go to food. I did what anyone would do in my situation I called mommy to freak out. Yeah, I'm a big mamma's boy but what good is having a loving supporting family if you never call on them?
My mother took the action she knew would serve me best. She told me to hold on, she told me she would send me some cash to float me by and told me I should do what I came here to do...if what she can provide is another week here than I should stay another week.
Thank you mom
Because the last thing I want to do is give up. After that call I went to central park to play harmonica for some dollars, hopefully enough to buy a meal. After a few hours I made just over 1.50. I took that gladly and used that plus what I had in my pocket to buy myself a lunch that was more than bread cheese and water.
After wandering around a bit I decided I should just go home. I was tired, I was cold I was wet from the rain and up until twenty minutes before I got on the train I was hungry most the day. I go to use my metro card "Insufficient fare"...Jesus...H...Christ...
I go to pay cash for more metro fare but all I have is a twenty and they have a six dollar change limit so I put in fifteen bucks and call it an investment. I'm discouraged, i'm tired and all i want is to be around someone I love. Well the woman I'm crazy about was vacationing in Florida and all my friends here were otherwise occupied. Fuck this...I'm going to sleep.
I wake up with a deep sense of melancholy and a certainty of failure but damn if I wasn't going to go out swinging. I went to my monday interview with the NY comedy club. The manager informs me it is a commission based ticket selling job. The tickets are twenty a piece for the first week or so I will make 50% commission 75 after that. He also tells me I can start tomorrow morning.
So i guess I have a job. I am excited because with what my mother and my Aunt Sharon are sending me all i have to do is sell 6 tickets tomorrow and I can pay rent. I am then called by a non prof 10$ an hour gig for an interview tomorrow. I will probably stick with the NY comedy job because they are really flexible, like "call in if you have an audition it's cool with us...hell if it's a really nice day out go ahead and call in just remember if your not selling your not making money" flexible. But I am going to reschedule the non prof interview for friday just in case i work this NY comedy job after a few days and realize it isn't going to work out.
After spending the rest of the day in Madison Square Park reading beat poetry and writing (cus I'm totally hipster like that) it was time for my very first NY audition for THE haunted house in America. The house is called "Nightmare" and it is the biggest haunted house in America...its a big deal. It's a "this looks damn good on a resume and gets crazy NY exposure" big. I walk in and the first thing the auditioned says is "awesome."
I feel like I did a good job, I feel like I nailed it. The only down side to this if I get the part is I wont be able to visit home in October. I will be back in Nov and I will figure out a way to see Lauren before than...I will make whatever I have to work because if I book my very first audition and can call myself a working actor after only a month of being here I can not pass up that opportunity.
Afterwards Jessica fed me (which is good because I had barely eaten today) and gave me booze. I'm going to bed with a full stomach, a slight buzz and a good feeling about the next few weeks.
Today was a good day...cross your fingers and send prayers that I can have a few more like this.
KH-
Friday, September 10, 2010
New York Day 22-23 "He's a Real No Where Man"
I hit the pavement like a trifling hoe the other day and let me tell you kids, it is hard out here for a pimp. I hopped a train to 8th ave and splurged on a bagel, yeah I don't have a lot of money but damn it I needed carbs and that new "Brooklyn Bagels" spot is amazing. I spent some more money I didn't have on printing out an updated resume and started my quest.
The mission, to hit every restaurant I came across until I was either out of resumes or out of gas. I had 20 resumes printed and my give em' hell attitude ready. First stop Ruby Tuesday's. I wanted to text my friend Chris and tell him I was applying at the NY location of his old rent winner...but SOMEONE still hasn't text me his number.
Next stop red lobster, I couldn't apply there though because they were only taking apps of people who have had 2 yrs or more of experience....really Red Lobster...really? You are Red Lobster, you are one half of surf and turf some how I don't think your job is "must have 2 yrs experience" hard.
Bubba Gump does open interviews but they stopped early that day so I bookmarked it for tomorrow. Planet Hollywood, Hard Rock cafe, two places I haven't been in before both took my resume and smiled and responded "we will be in touch in a week or two if we need you."
I stopped in a comedy club called "Caroline's" and the manager asked me "do you have any bar-tending experience?" "I have basic certification." He asked again "do you have any experience?" I should have taken his hint and lied but I didn't realize what was happening till it was too late, I got a polite handshake and a "come back with more experience."
The next 6 hours after this is a blur of snotty bar and grills with delusions of eloquence and run down diners no one has or ever will know the name of. I went from time square, ended up on the East side some how and ended my quest in the village. I hit up over 20 restaurants and handed out 10 resumes, 10 applications all with the same "we will call you" or "not hiring" response.
At this point I'm tired...I'm discouraged...and I'm starving. Time to meet Lindsay in Brooklyn for Matchless veggie burger and fries. Hanging out with Lindsay is always a good time and I was able to go back to my place with lifted spirits but dead tired. I than proceed to transfer to my train WAY too early and take an hour and a half to get back to my neighborhood.
I laid in bed and thought about the spectacular failure this day seemed to be. I thought about what it would look like if I had to go back to Illinois this quickly and than I passed the hell out mid thought because I was indeed that tired.
Today I had high hopes even though the day before was stunningly bad. My days seem to be consistently starting with positivity regardless of the previous days events. I head out to Bubba Gump's again keeping a close watch on my phone because I was supposed to have a phone interview for a writing job at some point today.
I wait for a manager for almost an hour, get through half of Forest Gump with no sound playing on the TV in the waiting area. The manager talks to me for 3 minutes making sure I filled out the app correctly than tells me I will get a call tomorrow or the next day if they need anyone...really guy? an hour in your bullshit shrimp swiller and that is all you got for me?
I stop in a few other places I missed around time square getting the same kind of reactions I got yesterday. At this point I am really losing hope. I sit and I people watch in time square for a while, getting up to walk around now and again just hoping for a miracle, for something to jump out at me, hoping for a call or a sign or something.
Than it happened. I sat down at a table to smoke a cigarette and up walks a clown named peter who asks if he can sit with me. Peter dresses up like a clown a couple times a week and has people tip him for pictures with him. Peter is a funny old man who apparently has a lot of wisdom and even more time on his hands.
Peter tells me "you should ask those people handing out the fliers where to apply you know they make 8 dollars an hour doing that." No...no I didn't know that Peter thank you, it is time for me to start asking flyer peddlers for applications. Peter than hands me a dollar he got from someone taking his picture and says "hey what goes around comes around."
I shit you not this is real life...
I ask two different flyer guys where to go. The comedy flyer guy gives me a name and a number, I call the number ask for the name and the name gives me an address and tells me "tell em' you talked to me already and be there around 1 on monday for an interview." Than I go to the sight seeing bus stop and they tell me to come back between 9 and 5 on monday and go to the third floor.
I now have two appointments on monday for possible income. I also came across an street team job (basically the same thing as flyer peddling) on craigslist, now I have another number to call on monday.
I also found out you can sell plasma twice a week so tomorrow is blood selling day...I ended this day feeling like I wasn't going anywhere and I was destined for illinois again (at least for a few months till I have the money to come back). I walk into the door to my apt and the family I live with is celebrating a birthday. They feed me like a king and take my laundry to the dryer in the basement for me.
I suddenly feel like I might be able to make this work if I can just squeeze another week or two out of this apartment, which, with the blood selling I might be able to do. I don't know why but tonight is ending with optimism. The hardest part will just be waiting for Monday.
This blog post is dedicated to Peter The Clown.
"It's only money son."
-Peter The Clown
...thank you kind sir...thank you.
KH-
The mission, to hit every restaurant I came across until I was either out of resumes or out of gas. I had 20 resumes printed and my give em' hell attitude ready. First stop Ruby Tuesday's. I wanted to text my friend Chris and tell him I was applying at the NY location of his old rent winner...but SOMEONE still hasn't text me his number.
Next stop red lobster, I couldn't apply there though because they were only taking apps of people who have had 2 yrs or more of experience....really Red Lobster...really? You are Red Lobster, you are one half of surf and turf some how I don't think your job is "must have 2 yrs experience" hard.
Bubba Gump does open interviews but they stopped early that day so I bookmarked it for tomorrow. Planet Hollywood, Hard Rock cafe, two places I haven't been in before both took my resume and smiled and responded "we will be in touch in a week or two if we need you."
I stopped in a comedy club called "Caroline's" and the manager asked me "do you have any bar-tending experience?" "I have basic certification." He asked again "do you have any experience?" I should have taken his hint and lied but I didn't realize what was happening till it was too late, I got a polite handshake and a "come back with more experience."
The next 6 hours after this is a blur of snotty bar and grills with delusions of eloquence and run down diners no one has or ever will know the name of. I went from time square, ended up on the East side some how and ended my quest in the village. I hit up over 20 restaurants and handed out 10 resumes, 10 applications all with the same "we will call you" or "not hiring" response.
At this point I'm tired...I'm discouraged...and I'm starving. Time to meet Lindsay in Brooklyn for Matchless veggie burger and fries. Hanging out with Lindsay is always a good time and I was able to go back to my place with lifted spirits but dead tired. I than proceed to transfer to my train WAY too early and take an hour and a half to get back to my neighborhood.
I laid in bed and thought about the spectacular failure this day seemed to be. I thought about what it would look like if I had to go back to Illinois this quickly and than I passed the hell out mid thought because I was indeed that tired.
Today I had high hopes even though the day before was stunningly bad. My days seem to be consistently starting with positivity regardless of the previous days events. I head out to Bubba Gump's again keeping a close watch on my phone because I was supposed to have a phone interview for a writing job at some point today.
I wait for a manager for almost an hour, get through half of Forest Gump with no sound playing on the TV in the waiting area. The manager talks to me for 3 minutes making sure I filled out the app correctly than tells me I will get a call tomorrow or the next day if they need anyone...really guy? an hour in your bullshit shrimp swiller and that is all you got for me?
I stop in a few other places I missed around time square getting the same kind of reactions I got yesterday. At this point I am really losing hope. I sit and I people watch in time square for a while, getting up to walk around now and again just hoping for a miracle, for something to jump out at me, hoping for a call or a sign or something.
Than it happened. I sat down at a table to smoke a cigarette and up walks a clown named peter who asks if he can sit with me. Peter dresses up like a clown a couple times a week and has people tip him for pictures with him. Peter is a funny old man who apparently has a lot of wisdom and even more time on his hands.
Peter tells me "you should ask those people handing out the fliers where to apply you know they make 8 dollars an hour doing that." No...no I didn't know that Peter thank you, it is time for me to start asking flyer peddlers for applications. Peter than hands me a dollar he got from someone taking his picture and says "hey what goes around comes around."
I shit you not this is real life...
I ask two different flyer guys where to go. The comedy flyer guy gives me a name and a number, I call the number ask for the name and the name gives me an address and tells me "tell em' you talked to me already and be there around 1 on monday for an interview." Than I go to the sight seeing bus stop and they tell me to come back between 9 and 5 on monday and go to the third floor.
I now have two appointments on monday for possible income. I also came across an street team job (basically the same thing as flyer peddling) on craigslist, now I have another number to call on monday.
I also found out you can sell plasma twice a week so tomorrow is blood selling day...I ended this day feeling like I wasn't going anywhere and I was destined for illinois again (at least for a few months till I have the money to come back). I walk into the door to my apt and the family I live with is celebrating a birthday. They feed me like a king and take my laundry to the dryer in the basement for me.
I suddenly feel like I might be able to make this work if I can just squeeze another week or two out of this apartment, which, with the blood selling I might be able to do. I don't know why but tonight is ending with optimism. The hardest part will just be waiting for Monday.
This blog post is dedicated to Peter The Clown.
"It's only money son."
-Peter The Clown
...thank you kind sir...thank you.
KH-
Wednesday, September 8, 2010
New York Day 21 "B.A.M.F"
::This blog entry contains adult language::
I'm updating you early because I wont have time tomorrow to do that. My day was incredibly unproductive but it did give me a lot of time to think. I went to the DMV to get my non drivers ID for my security license. First I went to the DMV on 8th ave only to be told that for what I need, because I never had an NYS ID before I needed to go to the DMV on 6th. I walk my happy self over there, catching up with travis on the phone as I walk, get to the floor the DMV is on and strap in for a long day of waiting.
The DMV office is pretty much what you would expect it to be, white with that awful puke green in a solid stripe around all the pillars and bordering the walls. I stand in a line that seems to be uncharacteristically long for what it is for. When I see a line this long I assume it's for a roller coaster, a bar, a sold out concert...a blow job contest...something...anything more interesting or fun than to get some personal identification.
I stand in this line for almost 3 and a half hours only to be told that I don't have enough ID to get an ID. I need my original birth certificate as well as something other than my drivers license and social security card for me to prove it's me. I walk out discouraged, and start wandering aimlessly just to collect myself. I have to sit down eventually, I had been standing for so long and than the walking married to the fact that I had a muffin for breakfast 9 hours prior and that was the extent of my food intake for the day just left me exhausted. After a short rest and a moral boosting talk with Alex it was time to walk back over to the temp agency I went to before.
I renew my application I fill out the hiring packet and they tell me to sit and wait because they will have work for me today. I sit and wait for another 3 hours and no work...at all. I could have been finding work for myself, setting up interviews, dropping of resumes in that time...I would have been livid were it not for meeting a guy who seemed fairly nice. While I was waiting I called a security office about a job and they gave me an interview but told me I would have to pay 100 for my 16 hour training (I only have the 8 hour). I told this to the guy I was making friends with and he tells me "Yeah I used to work at that office they sell security training...they told you a hundred but when you get there they will rack up fees and processing charges and it will be more like 200, bet they promised you a desk job checking people in and out huh? yeah I know that speech and you get those jobs but not often."
Well thank you kind stranger...I didn't have the hundred anyway. I walked out of that temp agency once again feeling lost, angry, scared. I call Lauren as I try and regroup and figure out my next move. My spirits lifted a bit after that conversation but I still needed my woosah moment, a calming of the spirit. I get myself a slice of veggie pizza because holy hell I need some food in me. Right next to the Madison Square Garden there is a Borders and I know I can always find solace there. I am walking through these isles reading covers and titles when really all i want to do is teleport to my old bed just for a couple hours, for a nap in a familiar place with familiar things.
There are some times where a boy just needs his Mother, so I gave her a call. After having her offer me some perspective, and after i was done squeezing out some tears like a little girl I had to let her go. I sat on the steps of the Garden for a few minutes when it hit me, like a sack of bricks I realized something, I had a revelation. Yes I am tired, I am lonely, I am homesick, yes I am scared about the future...but I'm Kyle Fucking Hoskins.
I get scared and I soldier on, I get tired and I regroup, I get lonely and I make some new friends and call old ones if I have to, I get homesick I wander into a borders and remember Rockford. I did all of these things today because that is what I do...how on earth could I have forgotten that I am Kyle Fucking Hoskins a BAMF from Illinois with a dream on his back and a give em hell attitude?
I sucked up the snot I had been sniffling, let my eyes dry, bought a pouch of drum tobacco (screw you I earned it) rolled a cigarette, lit it up and walked to Jessica's for some more of my things with the re realized knowledge that I get shit done...it's what I do. If I need to cry I'm man enough to do it but I don't ever forget that failure isn't a word I recognize, it isn't an option and it is a non possibility.
Tonight I revamp my resume for service industry work. Tomorrow I go door to door, restaurant to restaurant, at least ten till I get an interview. I do the same thing every day till I get a steady job again. I sell some blood if I have to, I make my money stretch, I make it work. I'm Kyle Fucking Hoskins and I'm Dream Catching in New York City and I should never...ever forget that.
KH-
I'm updating you early because I wont have time tomorrow to do that. My day was incredibly unproductive but it did give me a lot of time to think. I went to the DMV to get my non drivers ID for my security license. First I went to the DMV on 8th ave only to be told that for what I need, because I never had an NYS ID before I needed to go to the DMV on 6th. I walk my happy self over there, catching up with travis on the phone as I walk, get to the floor the DMV is on and strap in for a long day of waiting.
The DMV office is pretty much what you would expect it to be, white with that awful puke green in a solid stripe around all the pillars and bordering the walls. I stand in a line that seems to be uncharacteristically long for what it is for. When I see a line this long I assume it's for a roller coaster, a bar, a sold out concert...a blow job contest...something...anything more interesting or fun than to get some personal identification.
I stand in this line for almost 3 and a half hours only to be told that I don't have enough ID to get an ID. I need my original birth certificate as well as something other than my drivers license and social security card for me to prove it's me. I walk out discouraged, and start wandering aimlessly just to collect myself. I have to sit down eventually, I had been standing for so long and than the walking married to the fact that I had a muffin for breakfast 9 hours prior and that was the extent of my food intake for the day just left me exhausted. After a short rest and a moral boosting talk with Alex it was time to walk back over to the temp agency I went to before.
I renew my application I fill out the hiring packet and they tell me to sit and wait because they will have work for me today. I sit and wait for another 3 hours and no work...at all. I could have been finding work for myself, setting up interviews, dropping of resumes in that time...I would have been livid were it not for meeting a guy who seemed fairly nice. While I was waiting I called a security office about a job and they gave me an interview but told me I would have to pay 100 for my 16 hour training (I only have the 8 hour). I told this to the guy I was making friends with and he tells me "Yeah I used to work at that office they sell security training...they told you a hundred but when you get there they will rack up fees and processing charges and it will be more like 200, bet they promised you a desk job checking people in and out huh? yeah I know that speech and you get those jobs but not often."
Well thank you kind stranger...I didn't have the hundred anyway. I walked out of that temp agency once again feeling lost, angry, scared. I call Lauren as I try and regroup and figure out my next move. My spirits lifted a bit after that conversation but I still needed my woosah moment, a calming of the spirit. I get myself a slice of veggie pizza because holy hell I need some food in me. Right next to the Madison Square Garden there is a Borders and I know I can always find solace there. I am walking through these isles reading covers and titles when really all i want to do is teleport to my old bed just for a couple hours, for a nap in a familiar place with familiar things.
There are some times where a boy just needs his Mother, so I gave her a call. After having her offer me some perspective, and after i was done squeezing out some tears like a little girl I had to let her go. I sat on the steps of the Garden for a few minutes when it hit me, like a sack of bricks I realized something, I had a revelation. Yes I am tired, I am lonely, I am homesick, yes I am scared about the future...but I'm Kyle Fucking Hoskins.
I get scared and I soldier on, I get tired and I regroup, I get lonely and I make some new friends and call old ones if I have to, I get homesick I wander into a borders and remember Rockford. I did all of these things today because that is what I do...how on earth could I have forgotten that I am Kyle Fucking Hoskins a BAMF from Illinois with a dream on his back and a give em hell attitude?
I sucked up the snot I had been sniffling, let my eyes dry, bought a pouch of drum tobacco (screw you I earned it) rolled a cigarette, lit it up and walked to Jessica's for some more of my things with the re realized knowledge that I get shit done...it's what I do. If I need to cry I'm man enough to do it but I don't ever forget that failure isn't a word I recognize, it isn't an option and it is a non possibility.
Tonight I revamp my resume for service industry work. Tomorrow I go door to door, restaurant to restaurant, at least ten till I get an interview. I do the same thing every day till I get a steady job again. I sell some blood if I have to, I make my money stretch, I make it work. I'm Kyle Fucking Hoskins and I'm Dream Catching in New York City and I should never...ever forget that.
KH-
New York Day 19-20 "ebbs and flows"
Day 19 doesn't really go as I expected. It was labor day and my boss who was looking at getting me a place wasn't in. I am slowly starting to realize at this point that no one at this bar has a clue as to what is going on in general. They say a lot of shit and follow through on none of it. This sends a wave of panic through my spine...I need to find a place...soon.
I was able to crash at Lindsay's again but before it was time to sleep it was time to freak out and craigslist hunt for desperate roommates. After I found every craigslist add I could that wasn't a scam or an add for something else there was nothing else to do but try and forget my worries with Lindsay...so we went to sing at piano's.
Something this city has made me realize...I didn't know what living in the moment was till I moved here. I have the weight of the world on my shoulders when I get to Lindsay's and some how I am able to forget it entirely for an evening and join an entire bar in a chorus of "Bohemian Rhapsody".
I woke up on day 20 a man on a mission. I had a list of apartments to call and not a lot of time to do it in. The first place I call says I can see the place that day. It's all the way in Washington Heights which is about a thirty min subway ride from downtown and a bit longer if you are coming from brooklyn like I was so I high tailed it.
I show up to the building in a not so terrible neighborhood, the room is in an apartment owned by a very nice Mexican family who tell me that I can pay the deposit of 360 (2 weeks in advance) and move in the same day.
I'm on top of the world at that point, it is a small room in a clean apartment in a safe building in a relatively safe neighborhood...I couldn't have done better. I go into work which wasn't a bad day and than get hit in the face with yet another obstacle. Charlie, the co owner of the bar, pulls me aside and tells me not to come in tomorrow. He says to call him to find out if I work on Friday.
I ask Charlie, "do i still have a job?" He shrugs his shoulders and says "I'm trying some other guys out." I ask "Did I do something wrong?" "No kid I'm just trying some new guys out checking out my options."
...sound of breaking glass...you piece of shit...
How much money do I want to put down that says Charlie has a buddy who needs a job and Charlie is "creating a position"...I believe people from where he comes from would use the phrase "that rat bastard"
So I'm panicking again...
Upsides I have 2 weeks paid in a place and i found this job in 4 days of actual all day looking. Today is temp agency day...I need to find another job and I think I will i'm just stressing over it. This city has a way of working out but it also has a way of taking you through the ringer before it works out. This is my life now, everyone has ebbs and flows...but in this city the valleys drop quick and the mountain tops take your breath away.
wish me luck on this rollercoaster because I'm going to need it.
KH-
I was able to crash at Lindsay's again but before it was time to sleep it was time to freak out and craigslist hunt for desperate roommates. After I found every craigslist add I could that wasn't a scam or an add for something else there was nothing else to do but try and forget my worries with Lindsay...so we went to sing at piano's.
Something this city has made me realize...I didn't know what living in the moment was till I moved here. I have the weight of the world on my shoulders when I get to Lindsay's and some how I am able to forget it entirely for an evening and join an entire bar in a chorus of "Bohemian Rhapsody".
I woke up on day 20 a man on a mission. I had a list of apartments to call and not a lot of time to do it in. The first place I call says I can see the place that day. It's all the way in Washington Heights which is about a thirty min subway ride from downtown and a bit longer if you are coming from brooklyn like I was so I high tailed it.
I show up to the building in a not so terrible neighborhood, the room is in an apartment owned by a very nice Mexican family who tell me that I can pay the deposit of 360 (2 weeks in advance) and move in the same day.
I'm on top of the world at that point, it is a small room in a clean apartment in a safe building in a relatively safe neighborhood...I couldn't have done better. I go into work which wasn't a bad day and than get hit in the face with yet another obstacle. Charlie, the co owner of the bar, pulls me aside and tells me not to come in tomorrow. He says to call him to find out if I work on Friday.
I ask Charlie, "do i still have a job?" He shrugs his shoulders and says "I'm trying some other guys out." I ask "Did I do something wrong?" "No kid I'm just trying some new guys out checking out my options."
...sound of breaking glass...you piece of shit...
How much money do I want to put down that says Charlie has a buddy who needs a job and Charlie is "creating a position"...I believe people from where he comes from would use the phrase "that rat bastard"
So I'm panicking again...
Upsides I have 2 weeks paid in a place and i found this job in 4 days of actual all day looking. Today is temp agency day...I need to find another job and I think I will i'm just stressing over it. This city has a way of working out but it also has a way of taking you through the ringer before it works out. This is my life now, everyone has ebbs and flows...but in this city the valleys drop quick and the mountain tops take your breath away.
wish me luck on this rollercoaster because I'm going to need it.
KH-
Monday, September 6, 2010
New York Days 16-18 “ Like A Rolling Stone”
What?....WHAT?...it’s only been 4 days since I last posted? Unbelievable. After this last four days I feel like I’ve been here for months. Well I guess I should get to telling you what’s been going on.
Thursday it was a whole lot of nothing with a healthy dose of fear and worry thrown in I sat and I freaked out about my living situation and it didn’t help that it was my day off so I had nothing else to do that day. I did however have some nice bonding time and pizza with the roomie. I still felt the pressure though because I had a possible place to live I just couldn’t move in for a few days.
Friday was more of the same, although at the end of this day my living situation became a bit more complicated. For reasons that are too complicated to go into it became clear that the best thing for everyone was if I stayed with Lindsay till I could get into my new place which I still hadn’t seen.
Saturday seems to run all the way into today. I go to work and at the tail end my boss has a guy who lives in the place he wants to show me take me to Jersey to check out the “apartment”. It is an absolute shit hole. It’s a bedroom smaller than the one I had growing up with a communal bathroom and kitchen and it’s filled with drug addicts. At first I was fairly discouraged but than I realized a few things.
First, I don’t have to make this a long term situation. I am making enough money were, especially when I get a second Job, i can move out in 2,3 months tops. the only reason I’m not living in an apartment that is only a couple hundred more in Brooklyn is I didn’t have the deposit. I save up and I move as soon as I can simple as that.
Second I lived around drug addicts before it isn’t a problem for me. I can consider this my starving artist punk rock days. I can look back and say “hey remember that shit hole I lived in when I first moved to New York? Crazy huh?” After looking at the apartment It was time to go to a secret warehouse party I heard about through lindsay.
I find my way to the train that takes me to the area where the party is. If Brooklyn had a middle of nowhere this would be it. I walk to the street the warehouse is supposed to be on through a neighborhood were I’m fairly certain that the only reason my color didn’t get my ass kicked is because of my size.
I follow the groups of people walking past a chain link fence to the back of a warehouse. I walk through a gravel parking lot and when I turn the corner of the first warehouse I see that tucked far in the back, behind a block of warehouses is an old train service station. The dilapidated train tracks still leading to this place. Red lights are shining from this place and an arch of balloons overhang the massive entrance.
I stand in the line to get in and people watch all the people who came dressed up. The theme was Japanese Imperialism...or something like that. I am so excited by the time I get to the door I can barely contain myself. I have never been to anything like this before and the fact that a perfectly reasonable ice breaker for this thing is “how did you hear about this thing?” made the entire event that much more exciting.
I walk and I am overcome by how unique it all is. It was essentially an art exhibition with a rave going on in the middle and a bar off to the side. There was a booth where you could confess your sexual sins and they would “punish” you accordingly (meaning they hit you with sex toys while your friends take pictures and laugh). There was a booth for “Rape-O the clown” where you could pay 25 cents and get insulted. there was an entire area where they had laid down astro turf and covered in in rose petals for people to lay down and play in.
There were booths designed to befuddle your senses and even a small hookah lounge area. I visited most of these areas a few times, it was pretty incredible. I was surrounded by people and music. The music was some pretty intense trance techno, not some shitty house music but real techno that made your chest beat and forced your body to move. And of course I was greeted every now and again by a heavy waft of pot smoke.
I took it all in and enjoyed the site of party goes making out in the rose petals and the dance floor...from what I understand my friend Lindsay got to see a lot more than that when she walked past an alley to get to the party.
It was the biggest display of art, hedonism and self expression I had ever seen. I danced my ass off and marveled at what I saw till 6 o clock in the morning. I hopped in a car that the rest of my group came here in and we drove back to Lindsay’s and passed out.
When I woke up yesterday it was time to go to work. My things where still at Jessica’s so I headed over there to change than went to work. There I met a pretty cool band named “The Naked Apes” from Connecticut. I called my boss to see if I could give him a smaller down payment now and pay the rest on thursday for the apt he said it should be fine but I guess I will see today.
After work it was time to go back to Brooklyn. I met some more new people, ate some great food and went back to Lindsay’s, at this point I was so tired I could barely keep my head up and I was never so happy to see a bedroll and a shower. Now I a writing this on the brink. I find out today if I have a stable place to lay my head and if the answer is yes I will have mixed feelings about it. I am going to close my eyes and barrel through this next month or so just as fast as I can. I am going to hustle and scrape for this money because I really don’t want to live as far out as I am in the place that I am.
But I am keeping a good attitude about it all. This is living, these are stories to tell, these are my real nomad days. My all or nothing, young and reckless, dream catching days. I knew it would be hard and I am secretly enjoying every hardship because I know it is leading me towards greatness.
KH-
P.S I should take a moment to mention. My friends have been a constant source of help and support. I have been given food when I was hungry, a place to sleep when I had none and support when I was feeling broken. Lindsay and Jessica especially have helped me make sure I don't go hungry or have to sleep in a door Jam. And Lauren has been a daily and constant source of strength and support. She never lets me forget that I can do this and she is always checking to make sure I'm okay. She helps keep the smile on my face. Travis, and Alex are always open to me if I call they answer and are ready to tell me to man up and do what needs to be done. My poor mother is consistently rooting for me even though I know hearing about my hard times worries her out of her mind she never makes me feel guilty for leaving.
I love you all, deeply.
Thursday it was a whole lot of nothing with a healthy dose of fear and worry thrown in I sat and I freaked out about my living situation and it didn’t help that it was my day off so I had nothing else to do that day. I did however have some nice bonding time and pizza with the roomie. I still felt the pressure though because I had a possible place to live I just couldn’t move in for a few days.
Friday was more of the same, although at the end of this day my living situation became a bit more complicated. For reasons that are too complicated to go into it became clear that the best thing for everyone was if I stayed with Lindsay till I could get into my new place which I still hadn’t seen.
Saturday seems to run all the way into today. I go to work and at the tail end my boss has a guy who lives in the place he wants to show me take me to Jersey to check out the “apartment”. It is an absolute shit hole. It’s a bedroom smaller than the one I had growing up with a communal bathroom and kitchen and it’s filled with drug addicts. At first I was fairly discouraged but than I realized a few things.
First, I don’t have to make this a long term situation. I am making enough money were, especially when I get a second Job, i can move out in 2,3 months tops. the only reason I’m not living in an apartment that is only a couple hundred more in Brooklyn is I didn’t have the deposit. I save up and I move as soon as I can simple as that.
Second I lived around drug addicts before it isn’t a problem for me. I can consider this my starving artist punk rock days. I can look back and say “hey remember that shit hole I lived in when I first moved to New York? Crazy huh?” After looking at the apartment It was time to go to a secret warehouse party I heard about through lindsay.
I find my way to the train that takes me to the area where the party is. If Brooklyn had a middle of nowhere this would be it. I walk to the street the warehouse is supposed to be on through a neighborhood were I’m fairly certain that the only reason my color didn’t get my ass kicked is because of my size.
I follow the groups of people walking past a chain link fence to the back of a warehouse. I walk through a gravel parking lot and when I turn the corner of the first warehouse I see that tucked far in the back, behind a block of warehouses is an old train service station. The dilapidated train tracks still leading to this place. Red lights are shining from this place and an arch of balloons overhang the massive entrance.
I stand in the line to get in and people watch all the people who came dressed up. The theme was Japanese Imperialism...or something like that. I am so excited by the time I get to the door I can barely contain myself. I have never been to anything like this before and the fact that a perfectly reasonable ice breaker for this thing is “how did you hear about this thing?” made the entire event that much more exciting.
I walk and I am overcome by how unique it all is. It was essentially an art exhibition with a rave going on in the middle and a bar off to the side. There was a booth where you could confess your sexual sins and they would “punish” you accordingly (meaning they hit you with sex toys while your friends take pictures and laugh). There was a booth for “Rape-O the clown” where you could pay 25 cents and get insulted. there was an entire area where they had laid down astro turf and covered in in rose petals for people to lay down and play in.
There were booths designed to befuddle your senses and even a small hookah lounge area. I visited most of these areas a few times, it was pretty incredible. I was surrounded by people and music. The music was some pretty intense trance techno, not some shitty house music but real techno that made your chest beat and forced your body to move. And of course I was greeted every now and again by a heavy waft of pot smoke.
I took it all in and enjoyed the site of party goes making out in the rose petals and the dance floor...from what I understand my friend Lindsay got to see a lot more than that when she walked past an alley to get to the party.
It was the biggest display of art, hedonism and self expression I had ever seen. I danced my ass off and marveled at what I saw till 6 o clock in the morning. I hopped in a car that the rest of my group came here in and we drove back to Lindsay’s and passed out.
When I woke up yesterday it was time to go to work. My things where still at Jessica’s so I headed over there to change than went to work. There I met a pretty cool band named “The Naked Apes” from Connecticut. I called my boss to see if I could give him a smaller down payment now and pay the rest on thursday for the apt he said it should be fine but I guess I will see today.
After work it was time to go back to Brooklyn. I met some more new people, ate some great food and went back to Lindsay’s, at this point I was so tired I could barely keep my head up and I was never so happy to see a bedroll and a shower. Now I a writing this on the brink. I find out today if I have a stable place to lay my head and if the answer is yes I will have mixed feelings about it. I am going to close my eyes and barrel through this next month or so just as fast as I can. I am going to hustle and scrape for this money because I really don’t want to live as far out as I am in the place that I am.
But I am keeping a good attitude about it all. This is living, these are stories to tell, these are my real nomad days. My all or nothing, young and reckless, dream catching days. I knew it would be hard and I am secretly enjoying every hardship because I know it is leading me towards greatness.
KH-
P.S I should take a moment to mention. My friends have been a constant source of help and support. I have been given food when I was hungry, a place to sleep when I had none and support when I was feeling broken. Lindsay and Jessica especially have helped me make sure I don't go hungry or have to sleep in a door Jam. And Lauren has been a daily and constant source of strength and support. She never lets me forget that I can do this and she is always checking to make sure I'm okay. She helps keep the smile on my face. Travis, and Alex are always open to me if I call they answer and are ready to tell me to man up and do what needs to be done. My poor mother is consistently rooting for me even though I know hearing about my hard times worries her out of her mind she never makes me feel guilty for leaving.
I love you all, deeply.
Thursday, September 2, 2010
New York Day 15 “Welcome To The Show.”
This wasn’t that eventful of a day which is kind of awesome because back in IL I would have called this day somewhat full. I had to get my papers in order and walk over to the DMV to get my state ID that I need to get my security license.
On the walk there I pass by non other than Lewis Freaking Black. He is easily in my top five favorite comedians and I walked past him on a wed afternoon on my way to the DMV. I am so glad it was hot as balls out and we both looked like we were in a hurry otherwise I would have stopped him and made an ass of myself.
I walked into the DMV realized this was going to be an all day affair and walked right out…I had to be at work in an hour and I’m used to the DMV being a 20-30 minute event. Note to self, New York is not Belvidere.
Work wasn’t too exciting, met some new people had some fun made some money. The highlight of the day was really the walk home. I ate way to much for 5 dollars, I saw two guys on two separate blocks playing some amazing drum solos on a few cans, some bongos and some buckets. I saw an Elvis impersonator in a Subway (as in the crappy sub restaurant not the subway) and I saw a half naked guy peeing on the sidewalk. No where could you get all that for five bucks, except of course the streets of Manhattan.
If everything goes according to plan and I have done the math correctly and the apartment my boss said I could get in Jersey pans out I will be on my own FINALLY come Wed, Thursday at the latest. Cross your fingers because any longer than that and I might have to come back to the good ol’ Midwest, my conscience couldn’t take living under the kindness of a friend for longer than that.
KH-
On the walk there I pass by non other than Lewis Freaking Black. He is easily in my top five favorite comedians and I walked past him on a wed afternoon on my way to the DMV. I am so glad it was hot as balls out and we both looked like we were in a hurry otherwise I would have stopped him and made an ass of myself.
I walked into the DMV realized this was going to be an all day affair and walked right out…I had to be at work in an hour and I’m used to the DMV being a 20-30 minute event. Note to self, New York is not Belvidere.
Work wasn’t too exciting, met some new people had some fun made some money. The highlight of the day was really the walk home. I ate way to much for 5 dollars, I saw two guys on two separate blocks playing some amazing drum solos on a few cans, some bongos and some buckets. I saw an Elvis impersonator in a Subway (as in the crappy sub restaurant not the subway) and I saw a half naked guy peeing on the sidewalk. No where could you get all that for five bucks, except of course the streets of Manhattan.
If everything goes according to plan and I have done the math correctly and the apartment my boss said I could get in Jersey pans out I will be on my own FINALLY come Wed, Thursday at the latest. Cross your fingers because any longer than that and I might have to come back to the good ol’ Midwest, my conscience couldn’t take living under the kindness of a friend for longer than that.
KH-
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