“A Rush Of Blood”
So much going on I don’t even know where to start. Did I mention yet I’m in a play called “Something Wicked”? It’s a modern day adaptation of Macbeth I play Murderer 1. It isn’t a grammy winning role or anything but I get to rough up an English girl and look scary which is pretty much what I do best.
I got another short paying gig. The director of Something Wicked is also a film student and I got 10 dollars an hour to be in his short film. I also was cast as “Chef Randy” in an upcoming web sitcom called “Doc and Marty’s”
It’s about 2 managers who run a Back To The Future themed restaurant. Filming for the pilot (which I’m not in) starts in a couple weeks. Episode 2 has a few chef Randy features in it that I’m looking forward to.
Summer is coming which means sales are getting better...I’m still running scared with the money thing but things are looking like it is going to be feast instead of famine again in a couple weeks.
I started going to yoga. There is a place called “Yoga For The People” in the East Village that hosts yoga sessions for donations and it has been amazing. Not only is my body getting it’s ass kicked but you would be surprised what yoga does for ones mental well being. Regular work outs have nothing on this stuff.
Put aside the fact that it constricts and releases arteries to provide a full arterial flush and cleans out my system but focusing my breathing and being lead in some light mediation has really opened some doors to me.
I’ve been more present for my own life which has been an issue recently. I think I’m becoming a little dependent because I haven’t been to yoga in a couple days and already I’m starting to feel a little disconnected again.
I’v even started to make some emotional break throughs that I have really been looking for in direct response to the yoga. The other day I was riding the train home from the session and I almost started to break down on the train when I realized the core issue of my denial about mom.
I have accepted the fact that mom is gone and that is the reality of my life now, I have embraced reality so as to go on living a normal life. I have said to myself I will be okay and it’s going to be okay. I have never said and believed, really believed that it’s okay that mom is dead.
I’ve never accepted the possibility that the fact that she is gone is okay...it isn’t good by any means but it’s okay...I don’t know if that makes sense. What I mean to say is that it is the natural order of things, people come and people go and that is okay...it’s not something anyone likes but it is what it is. That isn’t something I’m willing to accept just yet but at least I know where I’m trying to go now. Before that I had no idea what exiting my denial and acceptance looked like.
Life in the city continues to surprise and delight me. Adventures, new friends, hardships to keep it interesting, self discovery and not to mention .75 cent mini custard pies and 4 for 6 veggie dumplings in china town (a new discovery) and dollar pizza.(an old stand by)
I should probably mention China town. I saw the middle of China town for the first time really a couple days ago. It was kind of awesome. Like I said I stumbled on a bakery that sold little custard pies and chocolate rum balls for 75 cents. I also discovered veggie dumplings...they are pot stickers but with veggies instead of pork...and they are amazing.
The entire place felt exactly like what it was. It felt like an entire culture and country setting up shop in a foreign land. You could see the authentic Chinese market amidst all the Americanization. Cheap fruit, nick nack shops, everything with Chinese lettering on it...it was really surreal and I kept waiting to find someplace I could buy a mogwai...
(kudos to anyone who got the reference)
I love you all
KH-
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